Friends, I come to you today with a great sense of urgency.

The Oxford commas are dying. If we don’t take action, they may soon become extinct forever.

Signs of their demise have been appearing for years. We all know it. Yet, we turned our backs and pretended not to see. We turned our backs and said, “Someone else will take care of this. Someone else will save the commas.”

“Someone else” never showed up, my friends — someone else never shows up. The only question left is what we should do now.