Gutsy, coming out and saying this.
The part about just tearing everything down and constantly being critical and negative was the same experience I had when I started University as an English major. I honestly love literature and was willing to endure the challenges of a humanities in order to embrace that love, but in University all I found was English majors and professors who hated English literature. It was really fucking weird.
Anyway, I really appreciate this post. I also love philosophy and was excited to study that in school and found basically the same thing. Writers and speakers seemed to get bonus points for how unintelligible their work was. Just goofy.